Disavow Disgrace

I commented on a facebook post, confessing to a criminal act, that occurred around 45 years ago.

The post was about the struggles, of a single parent, working and living on a wage that barely made ends meet, and when the car breaks down, or the electric bill rises, the person can no longer keep up. They are in trouble. They slide down hill.

I had years like that, that were back breaking. Events in life, that were simple for others, were insurmountable hurdles, for me.

I was in my trailer, on the west side of Jacksonville, FL. I didn’t want to be there. My desire was to be at the beach. But I stayed by my family, because I was told that was best for me. After all, what was I going to do, if I got a flat tire, all the way out at the beach. So, I was by my family, not even a mile away. I might as well have been in California.

It was one of those cold snaps that we have in North Florida. It will be 32 degrees and below there at times. I know Yankees always think that’s nothing. Sorry, I’m not a Yankee. This is a southern story. I was cold to my bones.

My daughter and I huddled.

I remembered, that I had left a gas bottle, at another rental. I rationalized, that’s my gas bottle, and I’m going to go get it. I pulled up in front of the other trailer, and I could see the new tenants sitting on the couch, maybe watching TV. I went to that tank, with pipe cutters in hand, turned their gas off and cut the line. I grabbed that tank and ran like hell.

Then I was warm.

I look back on that, and I think of all of things in my life that went wrong.

How sad it is, that my family was near by, and I could not go there. THAT’S COLD!

My mother always told me. “You’ve made your bed, now lay in it.”

But I was warm that night.

Life is difficult, to say the least.

The truth will set you free, but first it will make you very nervous.

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