Following a death, engulfed in grief, mourners can take on the energy, of an out-of-control fire, behaving erratically and moving in a direction, that creates a veering and unpredictable path. They search for a target to blow their vaporous, hot air of anger. They want to hurt someone. Modern day bereaved, zero in on their quarry and begin to hurl their bombs. Hate filled words are the ammunition and cell phones are their technological armory. Continue reading Blocked and Deleted/Yet Another Battle in a War I Thought Was Over
Tag: family
Neurotic Anxieties
I wasn’t always grown.
I haven’t always been this old. We all were once children.
No one has to explain neurotic anxieties to me. Continue reading Neurotic Anxieties
A Sprinkle of Childhood
You have one man, with volcanic rage, simmering below the surface of his skin. You have one woman who is iron clad and formidable, prepared to protect the family at all cost. Each has their own story, steeped in alcohol, violence and money. Smiles would turn to grimaces – smile, frown – smile, frown – it was a dodge ball game. You would eventually get slammed.
Then take the kid. Twelve years old, eager to please; anxious to get every detail correct.
The man had given orders, “Go saddle up my horse”. Continue reading A Sprinkle of Childhood
The Family Finances
Internal thoughts have a way of surfacing, lingering, and then diving to the nadar of my existence, only to break through my encephalon, carrying crayons. I must have a window to spend time staring out of. It creates a division of mental gymnastics, pulling thread through my thoughts and gluing glitter across the nature on the other side of the pain. Continue reading The Family Finances
The Center
center |ˈsentər| (Brit. centre
verb
1 [ no obj. ] (center around/on or center something around/on) have or cause to have something as (a major concern or theme): the case centers around the couple’s adopted children | the plot centers on two young men | [ with obj. ] : he is centering his discussion on an analysis of patterns of mortality.
• (be centered in) (of an activity) occur mainly in or around (a specified place): the mercantile association was centered in northern Germany.
2 [ with obj. ] place in the middle: to center the needle, turn the knob.
• Football pass the ball back from the ground to another player to begin a down; snap.
I just finished watching the documentary of Joan Didion’s life ~ The Center Will Not Hold. Continue reading The Center
Immigrant
You will never have the whole picture.
Cardboard Castles
The other day I purged my reading list; people that I follow on WordPress. I hesitated at one by a Texas, desert dweller, Old Jules. I hadn’t read it in a while. However, I decided to keep it and I’m glad I did.
I read his post, The Nightmares of Acceptance.
He had once said that he did not write about his childhood. And that he never would.
Well, he did. Continue reading Cardboard Castles
Good and Bad ~ Ring the Bell
Your childhood seemed an endless nightmare./ You learned to surf and ride a horse. Ring the Bell
You encountered Ann Noreen, a nun with mental problems./ You received a better than average education. Ring the Bell
You married too young; into a tumultuous relationship./ You have a beautiful daughter. Ring the Bell Continue reading Good and Bad ~ Ring the Bell
Four Sisters
We were all nervy with an unspoken anticipation. We were accelerating toward something and we didn’t know what. Geek Love – Katherine Dunn
It’s safe to say that they were moving towards the grave, these long-gone ancestors of mine. In 1962, speed had a different connotation. It was the pace of a powder blue Impala, crossing long, low bridges, over deep, dark waters, heading south to Orangedale. The glide of a push button Dodge Dart, maneuvering the Trout River Bridge. And a big, black-house Mercury, lumbering through the neighborhood, to pick up Nell, who inched her way down the stairs of a Riverside, garage apartment. Continue reading Four Sisters
Family Poem
Nicotine/Jelly Bean~Methadone and Beer
Lying eyes/Sullen mouth
A life that’s full of FEAR
Fresh air and Sunshine
Sparkling Eyes and Smiles
Filled with Grace and Spirit Lead
Who will guide us Through our Trials
The family that prayers together~stays together.
The family that drinks together~stinks together.
*yes, you may quote me on that”
Fish Eye Farm 